Jokes about Wives
I came across these jokes in the Friendster Bulletin. Despite the fact that I am truly a WO-Man.. These jokes certainly cracks one up =P
I recently read that love is entirely a matter of
chemistry.
That must be why my wife treats me like toxic
waste.
-by David Bissonette
When a man steals your wife, there is no better
revenge than to let him keep her.
- by Sacha Guitry
After marriage, husband and wife become two
sides of a coin; they just can’t face each other, but
still they stay together.
-by Hemant Joshi
By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you’ll
be happy. If you get a bad one, you’ll become a
philosopher.
-by Socrates
Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents
us from achieving them.
-by Dumas
The great question… which I have not been able to
answer… is, "What does a woman want?
-by Sigmund Freud
I had some words with my wife, and she had some
paragraphs with me.
-by Anonymous
"Some people ask the secret of our long marriage.
We take time to go to a restaurant two times a
week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and
dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays."
-by Henry Youngman
"I don’t worry about terrorism. I was married for two
years."
-by Sam Kinison
"There’s a way of transferring funds that is even
faster than electronic banking. It’s called
marriage."
-by James Holt McGavran
"I’ve had bad luck with both my wives. The first one
left me and the second one didn’t."
-by Patrick Murray
Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming 1.
Whenever you’re wrong, admit it, 2. Whenever
you’re right, shut up.
-by Nash
The most effective way to remember your wife’s
birthday is to forget it once…
-by Anonymous
You know what I did before I married? Anything I
wanted to.
-by Henny Youngman
My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then
we met.
-by Rodney Dangerfield
A good wife always forgives her husband when
she’s wrong.
-by Milton Berle
Marriage is the only war where one sleeps with the
enemy.
-by Anonymous
A man inserted an ‘ad’ in the classifieds: "Wife
wanted". Next day he received a hundred letters.
They all said the same thing: "You can have
mine."
-by Anonymous
First Guy (proudly): "My wife’s an angel!" Second
Guy "You’re lucky, mine’s still alive."
